10 TYPE OF PEOPLE YOU MEET IN A BRT OR MOLUE (OMNI BUS) IN LAGOS.

  

As you know, commuting in Lagos especially on working days is not an easy one. From standing at the bus stop for hours, to running from one point to another to get on bus. Most times, the savior of the day is always the long buses which can either be Molue or BRT. They are saviors because, they move more passengers and of course, the price is cheap. Commuters who ply Lagos-Abeokuta exp. way, Lagos-Ikorodu, Obalende/CMS etc are no ignorance of this facts. Well, been a regular customer (make God answer prayer, make I buy my ride soon), I am able to draw out some funny characters I have met on these buses.

1. The Pervert: These are mostly men but sometimes, the female folks too can be crazy. These dudes have enough money to get on a small bus even if the fee is doubled the usual price or  chatter a plane to their destination if possible, but they won’t. They get to the bus stop on time but would rather wait till the bus is filled and join the standing committee. They immediately stand behind a lady with big bum and rub their kini on her, thereby releasing their thick akamu. Most times, they don’t escape without receiving a factory reset slap.

2. The Special candidate: These ones don’t have money for the fare but don’t care. Their confidence level is high that they’d rather take a seat than stand (I admire their courage though). Once the conductor approaches them, they simply tell him to go ahead with the rest of the passengers. If the conductor persists, they grow arrogant and sometimes throw up a fight.   

3. The Staff: Just like the special candidates, these ones don’t have the fare too, but they’re humble and cool tempered. They have different ID cards to show to the ticketers for BRT and knows the name of top officials of agbero if they find themselves on Molue.

4. The Rich: They sometimes are the most annoying set of people on the bus depending on their approach. These individuals are rich for they only go about with the biggest denomination of money i.e they have #1,000 for a #50 tfare. Well, everyone In general is somehow guilty of this in one way or the other. These individuals before you sit are already asking “Bro, how much dey ur hand?” or they wait till you bring out your wallet and stretch their ostrich neck for their big eyeball to access every denomination you have.

5. The one who has faith: These kinds hardly buy a bus ticket to sit. I don’t know how they do it but they somehow know the person who will drop at the closest bus stop. So, they wait for the bus to fill and slowly stand beside the seat of their target(s). If you mistakenly stand to buy gala, my guy, the real occupants are already on your seat.

6. The Intruder: These ones got no chill. They confidently explore your phone with their wide eyes. When chatting with your bae, don’t ever make a mistake because, they will correct you. They’re brilliant as hell.

7. The Story teller: These set of people are good narrators. They belong to the standing committees. Without no one asking them questions, they begin to narrate how they are standing on a bus for the first time in their life. They tell you if not for the large number of passengers at the bus stop, they don’t even board Molue in the first place. Who you epp???

8. The Glutton: No matter how early the bus is, they always have food in their bag (the female folks especially). Well, having food in the bag is not an issue, but the fact that they are always impatient to go eat when they get to their destination. The last time, a woman was eating eba on the bus, WTF!

9. The Conductor that got terminated in a packaging industry: The list will be incomplete without these folks. They got fired in a packaging industry for not carrying out their duties effectively after which they found themselves as a conductor on BRT. So, they try as much as possible to showcase their packaging talent by beautifully arranging 100 standing committees in a row for 50.

10. A Ticketer not a Conductor: These are the young chaps found only on BRT buses. Don’t make the mistake of calling them a conductor when they have your change, otherwise, you are on your own. To them, being a ticketer is fair enough to being a conductor.